The Night I lost my Common Sense
by DarkIthil
Summary: The older Hitachiin twin desperately tries to bring his Common Sense back. What logic can he use? Hikaru's POV. Warnings: not just slash but twincest! Oneshot.


**Summary: **The older Hitachiin twin desperately tries to bring his Common Sense back. Hikaru's POV.

**Warnings:** not just slash but twincest! Also general insanity and strange humor.

The author is deeply ashamed for the twincest, but I love the twins, I couldn't help it!

**Disclaimer:** Host Club is hilarious, I don't have enough wits to create something like that. Alas!

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**The Night I lost my Common Sense, aka The Unwritten Message**

My dear Common Sense,

No, not quite right.

Dear my Common Sense,

May I call you just Sensy? ... No, apparently not.

Now, you are probably tucked away somewhere in the deepest corner of my mind – how very un-sensible of you – and I know you are mad at me for all the times I ignored you, I'm sorry for that. I need you back. Hence this unwritten message, aka desperate train of thoughts in hope of bringing you back. I thought the best way to do so... Wait, are you asking who helped me to think of these ways? Well, since you've abandoned me, I didn't have much help in normal, logical thinking, so it's better not to dwell on the matter. As I was saying, the best way to do so would be to describe what had happened – what had caused all this mess, and explain to you, my dearest Common Sense, that it **wasn't** **so bad**.

As you may remember, but that would probably depend on which corner of my mind you are in, it all started in the middle of a rather insignificant, even boring, night... When I woke up, to be precise... For I'm not going to discuss the matter of my dreams, thank you very much. OK, so the night wasn't **that** boring, sheesh.

Where was I? Ahh, so I woke up to find the night peaceful, nothing could be heard through the window, no rustle of the leaves, no noise of cars. Very nice.

So I turned around to find my dear brother Kaoru curled near me, looking very adorable.

Now, you, my Common Sense, might want to point out that I'm a narcissist, but I assure you I'm not. For my other reliable informers – I'd identify them should I have my common sense! – notified that my brother and me are quite different in fact. Why else would I feel ridiculously happy when he smiles at me, and feel nothing when I smile at myself in a mirror? Or find his eyes sparkling why mine are just plain and dull?

Anyway, as he was looking all that cute I decided to enjoy the moment and watch him for a while. Why, that's what brothers do from time to time!

After some indefinite time span his expression changed: he wrinkled his nose a little, his breathing pattern became irregular, soon he started to move around in the bed. I admit that at first I was foolish enough to think it was a nightmare... then he moaned... Yeah, you get the picture.

A little mewling sound and my brother was awake.

Well, maybe, just maybe I wasn't listening to you, my Common Sense, otherwise I wouldn't do what I have done – I would've feigned being asleep, and wouldn't, absolutely wouldn't just lie there looking down at him curiously, interested. He was rather unnerved by my intense gaze, might I add.

"Hikaru," "Kaoru," we greeted each other.

I asked him if he was all right, managing to sound not very teasing, I do care for my little brother after all.

He averted his gaze and... Yes! There it was – a not faked for the customers, but real, made in Kaoru, blush!

Very well, I confess, at this point I probably started listening to you even lesser and lesser. But, my dearest Sensy, in return you should've started communicating with me louder and louder!

I leaned closer to my twin and asked in a sweet voice, "Did little Kaoru have an erotic dream?" pointedly looking at the telltale bulge in his pajama bottoms.

He bit his lip – ohh, what a sight! Then, with hardened resolve, Kaoru glared at me:

"So what? I'm a teenager, normal teenagers have such dreams occasionally, **you** have such dreams occasionally! Now, Hikaru, would you just let me pass so I can get rid of... the problem and go back to sleep!"

He tried to get up. Apparently you, my Common Sense, were not working very efficiently for I didn't let him go, instead pinning him down on our shared bed.

"Hikaru!" my brother was hissing at me. "Let me go to the bathroom please! It is already annoying enough, and you're not helping!"

I blinked at him, "You are wrong."

It was his turn to be perplexed, "Huh?"

I elaborated, "You're considering it in the wrong way. Instead of thinking about it as about an annoying problem you should regard it as something pleasurable."

I think we were both blushing in reaction to my words.

"Hikaru, let me go," he asked quieter this time.

"Shhh," I hushed, "let me help you." And eagerly started to fumble with his clothes.

Need I mention it provoked quite a reaction? Kaoru, stammering, blushing madly, hissing, otherwise moving, eyes wide, hair ruffled, grabbed my hands, forcing his fingers into my flesh, "Stop it!"

Nope, sorry, dear brother, I was in my unreasonable self at that moment.

"Kaoru! Let me do it for you!" maybe that came out even close to a breathless whine.

However, my dearest twin was in a state when he couldn't possibly appreciate all my good intentions. So, first thing first, I needed to lead him out of a near heart attack condition.

"Shh, relax, Kaoru, just relax," I spoke gently, regrettably having to cease my attempts of getting into his pants – that would have to wait.

I smiled at him, "What were you thinking? I wouldn't do anything unpleasant and hurtful to you! I love you, Kaoru! Why are you so frightened?"

"I'm not frightened," was his timid reply. "That was just **really** unexpected, and I... it's embarrassing."

Awww, he's just too cute for his own good... No digressing, no digressing! I'm sorry, my Common Sense, but since I've lost you it's more difficult to stay focused.

Anyway, it wasn't good to have your own twin freaked out by your displays of love. Then it hit me, _embarrassed_?

"Kaoru, do you think I'm embarrassing?"

"No," he answered. "It's not you, I feel ashamed of myself."

What? Now there, Sensy, I bet you were not expecting such reply – **I** was the one trying to... cough... make my brother feel better, and **he** was the one ashamed of himself? Probably he'd lost his Common Sense too. Well, we are twins after all.

I tried to explain to him that I loved him more than anyone and everyone in this world, and he really should just relax and let me do what would make him happy. He was having none of it, his cheeks still flushed.

I sighed, "Why are you so embarrassed, Kaoru. Explain this to me."

My brother seemed to think it over and said:

"Why am I embarrassed? Hikaru, we are twins, we know each other very well, but still being seen at the peak of pleasure, where one is nothing but a demented bundle of spasming muscles and fried nerves, when one can think of nothing coherent, hell, can't think at all? Where it's just frenzied itch that has to be, needs to be, must be scratched raw?"

His voice was quiet, only his eyes were so intense, smoldering, seemingly burning holes in my soul. Every time I attempted to breath there was a raucous noise, but Kaoru continued:

"I just don't want to be reduced to such embarrassing state in front of you."

Ha? I opened my mouth... The sound that I produced surely wasn't that high-pitched and breathless as I heard, right? OK, the second attempt was better:

"K-kaoru," I paused, thinking hastily how to reassure him and how not to sound as eager as I felt.

It was your brilliant idea, dearest Common Sense, which I'm extremely grateful for. I supposed:

"Kaoru, what if it was me who was in... Er... What I meant to say is, what if it was you who saw me in... such agitated state and I was asking you to... help me with my problem? Would you do it?"

He bent his head aside coquettishly, "Would you really ask me to pleasure you?"

Arg! That little demon! I blushed to the roots of my toenails.

"No! That's not what the question is about!" I took a deep breath, "What I mean to say, if you had to... p-pleasure me, would you be ashamed of doing it? For I'm trying to tell you that I would do **anything** just to make you happy. So would you be embarrassed?"

He studied me and smiled,

"Why would I be? Just like you, I'd do anything to make you happy."

And, just as I was beginning to relax, his gaze became more predatory as he – my dear, sweet, lovely, innocent, ingenuous twin – added in a drawling voice that made my insides curl and flip:

"Besides, to see you in the peak of **your** pleasure, to know that all you are feeling was brought by me, to make you sweat, arch, forget everything around you, make you unable to speak, so that all you articulate would be incoherent moans, moving in my arms in abandonment, to see your eyes glazed with haze and rolling backwards..." - He smiled, he **smiled! - **"That would feel quite nice for me too."

My breathing stopped completely.

He was sitting there in our dark enormous room, but I couldn't avert my gaze anywhere from his face, I felt as though I was suffocating and his eyes were burning too bright, when he leaned in, pointedly looking at the telltale bulge in **my** pajama bottoms, and whispered in my ear:

"Do you need help, Hi-ka-ru?"

And then I've lost my Common Sense.

So you see, dear Sensy, it wasn't so bad. Hell, that was the best night of my life!

Now please come back! I need you for a math test tomorrow. Besides, if you aren't going to return it'll make my brother worried. You don't want to worry Kaoru, do you? That would be just senseless!

Maddeningly happy and dementedly yours,

Hikaru Hitachiin

_- FIN -_

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Thus the question "What makes the author giggle like mad?" is answered! Don't you just love the twins and their craziness?

The style was an experiment – I was bitten by a plot bunny. Tell me if you liked it!


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